5 Things I’m Afraid to Tell You

August 2, 2017

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Hey There!

I’m Angela; photographer, encourager, and taco-obsessed. By learning how to control my thoughts I conquered depression, anxiety, body image, and fear.  Now I'm passionate about sharing my secrets with you!

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   A few months back I came across a blog in which someone shared 10 things they were afraid to share with their readers.  I had no idea exactly what would come out of my head when I began typing this out – but I knew it would be a blend of ‘this is where I struggle in my business’ and ‘this is what you would have never known about me personally’.  I’m very much human and I like seeing people share their vulnerabilities online in a way that gives people the permission they didn’t realize they needed to be human.  I hope this post doesn’t make you think, “Man, that Angela has some issues”, but instead feel inspired to level with the parts of your life that don’t seem “social media worthy”.
1.  I doubt my worth.
     I know this is something everyone encounters at some point, but I never realized just how much owning a business would affect my self-worth.  I can sell lotions and fragrances with ease (you get this if you know my employment history) but it is so stinkin’ hard to sell what I’m most passionate about.  Pricing my business profitably is one of my biggest struggles.  You would think it would be easy to charge for what you know you’re good at, but it’s not.
2. I am a recovering people-pleaser.
     Most of the time being a people-pleaser means you do whatever will make others happy in the given moment.  The problem is – other people don’t always KNOW what will make them happiest, or what you truly have to offer.  We can only know what we have access to know.  I want to truly serve people – but not putting myself first doesn’t put me in the position to give people my best.
3. I’m an “all or nothing” person.
    When I put my mind to something I go all in.  If I’m not all in, I’m ALL OUT.  This might seem like it could be a great thing because I am super motivated to accomplish my priorities.  But no, that is not how it has played out in my life.  As someone who has creative ideas all the time, I can jump from topic to topic and leave my “priorities” behind when my will changes.  When I get excited about something it has to be done right then!  But burn out is inevitable on that path.  I’ll spend days of overly-devoted work on a project only to realize that I piled too much on too quickly.  This “all or nothing” mindset is something I’ve really been working on personally, but it’s still a work in progress.
4. I hate social media. I really do.
     Some people may know this because we’ve had conversations about it.  Others of you have probably put two and two together and are thinking “this is no news, because there’s never news on your timeline”.  And you’re right!  But being a small business owner this is NOT acceptable!  You’re “supposed” to be present online and “all about it”.  I’m not.  This is going to sound dramatic, but I  ‘can’t even’ with Facebook.  When I was younger I was all about social media, until I realized the negative ways it affected my psyche.  (I’m not saying it has this effect on everyone.  Maybe I’m just mentally weaker than you, haha.)  When I stopped worrying about what everyone was posting online, I started growing a real life.  A real conscience.  Having real dreams.  Now, I’m beginning to like it a little more (especially Instagram – that’s my place). But I also think it’s because I have this vision of breaking away from the “highlight reels” we are so used to seeing people boast.  I like sharing things that make people think “yeah, that’s real. That is flawed.  But also encouraging.”
5.  I dream of having a brand that reflects both of my passions – art and health.
     How? I don’t know!  Somedays I think that I can serve my people better than I am currently and I don’t always envision it being a separate business or hobby.  Maybe there isn’t a market for that, or maybe there just isn’t anyone doing it.  In the past, I’ve felt that I can’t share my other passions because it doesn’t relate to my photography work.  But since I’ve told you how I feel about social media, maybe you won’t mind seeing posts from me that aren’t only about client photo sessions.  I adore my clients, but I want to share so much more than photos.
     Did I just make my blog a therapy session?  Quite possibly!  I think reasoning through your struggles is the best way to make progress.  But really, I wanted to be open and honest online and allow people into my world.  Leave me a comment below if I’m not alone in any of these and you can relate!

Disclaimer: 

DON'T FORGET - I'm not a doctor.  I share information to inspire you, but what you do with it is your responsibility.  If something I (or anyone) shares doesn't vibe right with you, ignore it. Be smart about the decisions you make for your betterment.

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